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New Life COTR Wednesday June 27, 2007
BUILDING A MARRIAGE THAT ROCKS
“The Law of Purity”
INTRODUCTION: For the last three Wednesday’s we’ve been discovering the spiritual laws of God that govern the institution of marriage. If these laws are followed we can know that we can have a 100% chance in marriage if we follow God’s laws.
Keynote scriptures: Genesis 2:24,25(NAS)- “For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother and cleave to his wife and they shall be one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and they were not ashamed.”
From these scriptures we find the four foundational laws of marriage that God has called both man and woman to follow and in turn the results will be a happy, productive, peaceful marriage.
A MARRIAGE BY GOD’S DESIGN!
Review: What are the three laws we’ve already discovered?
1. The law of Priority- “A man shall leave his father and mother.
2. The law of Pursuit- “and cleave to his wife.”
3. The Law of Possession- “the two shall become one flesh.”
TRANSITION: Tonight we’re going to focus on Genesis 2:25- “And the man and his wife were both naked and they were not ashamed.”
After God created Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, He did not clothe them. He did not intend to prepare artificial coverings for them. God’s perfect will was for them to remain naked.
In the beginning of time, God intended marriage to be a place of total “NAKEDNESS.”
Physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. This is the condition Adam and Eve enjoyed in the garden.
They were completely exposed before God and one another. In this condition they shared themselves totally in an atmosphere of intimacy and openness.
This is God’s picture of a perfect marriage relationship. It’s called the “LAW OF PURITY!”
Law of Purity- God designed marriage to operate in an atmosphere of purity. In that atmosphere we can expose ourselves to one another!
Marriage is designed in such a way that a man and woman instinctively share ourselves with one another.
However for this to take place there must be a prepared and protected atmosphere providing an environment for us both to “get naked.”
God designed the “nakedness” of marriage to include every area of our lives, body, soul and spirit.
When we are able to “undress” ourselves in every area before our spouses without shame or fear, we are in a healthy place for strong intimate relationships to develop.
If we cannot expose ourselves completely to our spouse we are hiding something. The hidden thing needs to be exposed.
SIN IS THE GREATEST OBSTACLE TO OPENNESS AND THE LAW OF PURITY.
After Adam and Eve sinned they searched for leaves to cover their genitals. Before they sinned their genitals were shamelessly uncovered.
This signifies three things:
1. Their differences could be openly expressed. (The genitals were the most obvious physical difference.)
2. They could have unhindered intimacy. (There was no clothing to remove for sex.)
3. Their most sensitive areas could be exposed without fear. (Genitals are the most sensitive area of the body.)
Conversely, the fig leaves with which Adam and Eve clothed themselves after sinned entered their relationship with God represent three things.
1. Our differences cannot be safely expressed where sin is present.
2. Sin damages and often destroys the atmosphere necessary to breed intimacy.
3. The sensitive areas of our lives and delicate issues in our relationships cannot be safely exposed when sin is present.
SIN IS THE GREATEST OBSTACLE TO OPENNESS
You can only expose yourself in an atmosphere of purity!
TRANSITION: There are three things to understand when applying the LAW OF PURITY to your marriage.
1. Sin is always deadly.
Romans 6:23- “For the wages of sin is death….”
2. Purity must be upheld by both partners in order for the relationship to provide a climate for total exposure.
Both partners in a marriage must be careful about what is allowed in their lives.
A spouse has a right to be concerned about every area of a partner’s life. Anything that person does will directly affect the other.
3. Purity is for every area of marriage.
When a robber wants to get into your home, he doesn’t need you to leave every door and window open. He only needs one way inside.
If he can gain one entry point, he can burglarize your entire house. THE SAME IS TRUE OF SIN!
The devil doesn’t need a person to sin in many areas in order to destroy that life or marriage. He only needs one entry point to give him a “stronghold” from which to bring destruction.
1Peter 5:8(NIV)- “Be self-controlled and alert. You enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”
SEVEN STEPS TO PURITY IN MARRIAGE
1. Take responsibility for your own behavior.
Don’t focus primarily on your spouse; focus on yourself. You cannot change his or her behavior. But with the help of God you can change yours.
Luke 6:41 (NIV)- “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?
Take responsibility for your own words and actions and build an atmosphere of purity and trust from your side first.
2. Do not return sin for sin.
God’s Word (Luke 6:27-36) tells us to return evil with good and even to love our enemies.
Revenge and retaliation will never solve a problem in a marriage. Those attitudes and behaviors will only perpetuate a problem and even make it worse.
Wives and husbands both must commit to using purity, not sin, in dealing with their problems.
3. Admit your faults.
The heartfelt and sincere expression, “I’m sorry; I was wrong; will you forgive me?” can heal a marriage quicker than almost anything else.
1John 1:9(NIV)- “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”
On the other hand, pride and self-deception lead to an atmosphere where exposure to one another is to risky.
James 4:6, 5:16(NIV)- “….God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.”
4. Forgive
Matthew 6:14-15(NIV)- “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
Forgiving other people is a serious issue God! Unforgiveness poisons our hearts.
Hebrews 12:15(NIV)- “See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.”
Unforgiveness is like a dead rat in the attic. IT MAKES THE WHOLE HOUSE STINK!!!
The opposite is true of forgiveness. We are blessed and refreshed when we forgive others and get rid of unhealthy thoughts and feelings.
Here are five steps to forgiveness:
*Release the guilty person from personal judgment.
*Love the person who has offended you.
*Bless and pray for that person.
*Do not bring up the hurt in the future.
*Repeat this process as many times as necessary.
5. Speak the truth in love.
In the marriage there should an atmosphere of communication in which each spouse can communicate in love their thoughts, emotions and feelings.
This is not retrieving old hurts. It is taking care of problems as they arise in order for the couple to live in purity.
Some scriptures from Ephesians should be remembered when spouses confront one another.
Ephesians 4:15, 25-27(NIV)- “Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.”
6. Pray for each other.
There may be some things in you spouse’s life that you simply cannot change. Only God can.
Pray for your spouse.
James 5:16(NIV)- “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.”
7. Seek righteous fellowship.
1Corinthians 15:33(NIV) “Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character.”
It is most difficult to keep a marriage pure when our main fellowship and association are with people who are impure.
YOU DON’T NEED FRIENDS WHO WILL SEDUCE YOU INTO SIN!
Before we can experience all of the beauty and holiness of purity, we must be in an atmosphere of purity.
CONCLUSION: The Law of Purity! Don’t allow yourself to be robbed of God’s best for your marriage by Satan’s lies. Be diligent to remain pure, and God will bless you beyond your wildest dreams!
Matthew 5:8(NIV)- “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.”
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
The Law of Purity - Pastor Ken Bent
Sunday, June 24, 2007
You Can Have What You Say - Pastor Kenneth Woolf
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New Life COTR Sunday June 24, 2007
THE POWER OF YOUR WORDS
“You Can Have What You Say”
INTRODUCTION: We’ve been in this series on the POWER OF YOUR WORDS. These scriptures say it all regarding the power in our words.
Proverbs 18:20,21(NIV)- “From the fruit of his mouth a man’s stomach is filled; with the harvest from his lips he is satisfied. The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.”
How do we work with God to bridle our tongue? Pause, Ponder and Pray!
YOU CAN HAVE WHAT YOU SAY! Many times when we talk about the power of our words we have to admit we focus on what we shouldn’t be saying. (The negative)
But if our words are truly powerful, and they are, shouldn’t we put as much or even more focus on what we SHOULD be saying!!!!
DON’T JUST STOP SAYING THE WRONG THING BUT START SAYING THE RIGHT THINGS.
TRANSITION: Today we’re going to look at a passage of scripture in the Gospel of Mark that we see a side of Jesus that may be unfamiliar to some of us.
Mark 11:12-25(NIV)- Turn and Read
Jesus tells us that when our words are words of faith in God we can “HAVE WHAT WE SAY.”
Jesus takes what appears to be a negative circumstance and gives a positive principle about the POWER OF OUR WORDS.
YOU CAN HAVE WHAT YOU SAY!
Romans 10:8(NIV)- “…The Word is near to you, it is in your mouth and in your heart, that is the Word of faith we are proclaiming.”
TRANSITION: Today I want to give you a Word to proclaim. That can be in your heart and in your mouth that you can proclaim.
WORDS TO PROGRAM YOUR SPIRIT FOR FINACIAL SUCCESS
****Remember to remove the negative and replace with the positive****
Make these confessions daily until faith comes.
I am filled with the knowledge of God’s will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding. His will is my prosperity. (Col. 1:19.)
God delights in my prosperity. He gives me power to get wealth, that He may establish His covenant upon the earth. (Deut. 8:18; 11:12)
I immediately respond in faith to the guidance of the Holy Spirit within me. I am always in the right place at the right time because my steps are ordered of the Lord.
(Psalm 37:23)
God has given me all things that pertain to life and godliness, and I am well able to possess all that God has provided for me. (Num. 13:30; 2Peter 1:3,4)
God is the unfailing, unlimited source of my supply. My financial income now increases as the blessings of the Lord overtake me. (Deut. 28:2)
As I give, it is given unto me, good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over. (Luke 6:38)
I honor the Lord with my substance and the firstfruits of my increase. My barns are filled with plenty, and my presses burst forth with new wine. (Prov. 3:9,10)
I am like a tree planted by rivers of water. I bring forth fruit in my season, my leaf shall not wither, and whatever I do will proper. The grace of God even makes my mistakes to prosper. (Psalm 1:3)
I am blessed in the city and blessed in the field, blessed coming in, and blessed going out. I am blessed in the basket and blessed in the store. My bank accounts, investments, health, and relationships flourish. The blessings of the Lord overtake me in all areas of my life. (Deut. 28:1-14)
The blessing of the Lord makes truly rich, and he adds no sorrow with it. (Prov. 10:22)
My God makes all grace abound toward me in every favor and earthly blessing, so that I have all sufficiency for all things and abound to every good work. (2Cor. 9:8)
The Lord has opened unto me His good treasure and blessed the work of my hands. He has commanded the blessing upon me in my storehouse and all that I undertake. ( Deut. 28:8,12)
I delight myself in the Lord, and he gives me the desires of my heart. (Psalm 37:4)
The Lord rebukes the devourer for my sake, and no weapon that is formed against my finances will prosper. All obstacles and hindrances to my financial prosperity are now dissolved. (Mal. 3:10,11; Isaiah 54:17)
My mind is renewed by the Word of God; therefore, I forbid thoughts of failure and defeat to inhabit my mind. (Eph. 4:23)
I am delivered from the power and authority of darkness. I cast down reasonings and imaginations that exalt themselves against the knowledge of God, and I bring every thought into captivity to the obedience of God’s Word. (2Corninthians 10:3-5)
I am filled with the wisdom of God, and I am led to make wise and prosperous financial decisions. The Spirit of God guides me into all truth regarding my financial affairs.
(John 16:13)
The Lord causes my thoughts to become agreeable to His will, and so my plans are established and succeed. (Proverbs 16:3)
There is no lack, for my God supplies all my needs according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus. (Phil. 4:19)
The Lord is my Shepherd, and I do not want. Jesus came that I might have life and have it more abundantly. (Psalm 23:1; John 10:10)
Having received the abundance of grace and gift of righteousness, I reign as a king in life by Jesus Christ. (Romans 5:17)
The Lord has pleasure in the prosperity of His servant, and Abraham’s blessings are mine. (Psalm 35:27; Galatians 3:14)
YOU CAN HAVE WHAT YOU SAY!
As you make these daily confessions, you may feel as if they are not true, but faith comes by hearing the Word of God, hearing yourself saying what God said about you.
The Word of God, conceived in the human spirit, formed by the tongue, and spoken out of the mouth, is creative power that will work for you!
Hebrews 10:23- “Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.”
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
The Law of Possession - Pastor Kenneth Woolf
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New Life COTR Wednesday June 20, 2007
BUILDING A MARRIAGE THAT ROCKS
“The Law of Possession”
INTRODUCTION: How many would agree that the Bible is not a suggestion? How many would agree that God knows best? How many would agree that the Bible is God’s Word?
So therefore, if correction is needed, who is the one who corrects their ways, their mindsets? We do.
So it is with marriage. God has a set of laws that govern the institution of marriage.
We can know that we can have a 100 % chance in marriage if we follow God’s law.
1.) The Law of Priority
2.) The Law of Pursuit- (marriage is work) to the degree that you work at your marriage is the degree it will work for you.
Genesis 2:24- “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife and the two shall be one flesh.”
“THE TWO SHALL BE ONE FLESH”
The intimacy and union of marriage is so profound that when God found a word to describe it was “ONE.”
YOU ARE GOING TO BE ONE! THE LAW OF POSSESSION!
God has designed marriage in such a way that there is to be co-ownership and co-administrating of everything in the marriage.
The laws of possession establishes trust and intimacy in the marriage! Once we understand and submit to this law, we will experience a significant depth of unity and bonding in the marriage.
Marriage is a complete union in which all things previously owned and managed individually (separately) are now owned and managed jointly!
THERE ARE NO EXCEPTIONS!
Anything in marriage that is not willfully submitted to the ownership of the other person is held outside the union, producing legitimate jealousy!
Becoming “one flesh” involves much more than just sex!
It involves merging everything owned by and associated with two persons into one mass, jointly owned and managed!
If there is something a spouse is unwilling to merge into the marriage, they are violated the LAW OF POSSESSION and violating the rights of the other spouse.
HOW DO THE TWO BECOME ONE? There must be a surrender of one’s individuality to the other.
People are naturally selfish and self-centered!
Anything that you will not surrender to co-ownership and management of the other spouse will cause resentment and jealousy in the marriage and will damage the relationship.
1Corinthians 7:3,4(NIV)- “The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife.”
Notice what Paul says about the ownership of our bodies in marriage. We are to change ownership and control in the management of our bodies to from sole personal ownership to shared ownership and control with our spouses.
Anything that is not mutually owned and controlled by both partners will lead to division and problems.
Each area that we surrender to joint ownership and control will build a spirit of trust and intimacy in the marriage.
It can be a job, a bank account, children or a home.
TRANSITION: Our marriage relationship mirrors our relationship with God!
Luke 14:33- “In the same way, any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple.”
How do I become intimate with Jesus? Give Him everything I have. I give-up total control to Jesus. I submit all that have to the authority of Jesus Christ.
IF there is anything in your life that you will not submit to Jesus, whether you realize it or not, you are saying that thing is more important than Jesus. Whether you realize it or not.
The things we will not give to Jesus become “idols” in His sight, and He refuses to compete with them.
Jesus is insulted when we will not trust Him with everything that we have.
The same is true on a different level with our spouses. If there is anything that we withhold from the relationship we tell our spouse that whatever it might be is more important than our spouse.
We are implying that we do not trust them enough to share it with them.
FOR YOU TO HAVE A TRUE INTIMATE RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD YOU MUST TRUST HIM WITH EVERYTHING! FOR YOU TO HAVE A TRUE INTIMATE REALTIONSHIP WITH YOUR SPOUSE YOU MUST TRUST THEM WITH EVERYTHING.
FOUR WAYS TO VIOLATE THE LAW OF POSSESSION
1. Dominance- this is very common in marriage. Disproportionate control of the marriage and those elements important to the marriage.
Dominance is destructive! Dominance is seizing control of the assets of the relationship. Money, children, time, interests and even friends.
Dominance means I’m in control and you’re just along for the ride. This violates the law of possession.
Genesis 2 never made a reference to who’s in authority in the marriage. The healthier your marriage gets the less you’ll talk about whose boss!
If you’re always talking about whose boss you have an unhealthy relationship!
Dominance is a lack of sharing of myself both internally and externally! Healthy marriages allow influence (IN EVERY AREA) from the other spouse!
There should be shared control of the relationship!
THE NEXT WAY WE CAN VIOLATE THE LAW OF POSSESSION
2. Being Independent and Selfish- not being willing to yield the things we have into the marriage.
This is my job, my money, my children. When we get married it’s all ours now! You have nothing to yourself!
Everything you have must be co-owned and co-administrated. Why do so many marriages end up in divorce in America?
Because we’re selfish people. MARRIAGE IS BRUTAL ON SELFISH PEOPLE!
THE NEXT WAY WE CAN VIOLATE THE LAW OF POSSESSION
3. Protecting assets for what you believe may be a good reason.
Blended Families! The number one issue is children
A couple comes in for counseling. The husband married a woman with a child from a previous marriage. The child was hurt in the previous marriage.
Now the mother won’t discipline the child or allow the step-father to discipline the child. SHE PROTECTING THE CHILD!
When you remarry those children must become the property of the new spouse. The new spouse must have the right to speak into the life of those children.
IF NOT, THOSE CHILDREN WILL DIVIDE THE MARRIAGE!
The woman in this marriage was more loyal to her children than to her new husband.
IN ANY BLENDED FAMILY THE FAMILY BUILDS AROUND THE MARRIAGE AND NOT THE CHILDREN!
You have to trust the person you’re married to enough to trust them with your children! IF YOU DON’T, DON’T MARRY THEM!
I TRUST YOU WITH EVERYTHING I BRING INTO THE MARRIAGE!
The home must be built around the marriage and the children must understand there is co-ownership!
THE FOURTH THING THAT VIOLATES THE LAW OF POSSESSION
4. Pre-Nuptial Agreements
Before we get married I want you to know that you’re not going to get all this stuff. (That’s a death sentence on a marriage)
When we get married there’s something I’m not going to give you!
TRANSITION: The law of possession says that everything in the marriage is to be co-owned and co-administered between the two spouses!
FOUR TRUTHS ABOUT THE LAW OF POSSESSION
1. Possessions communicate value- If I won’t give this up for you, you’re not as important as this.
2. Possessions conquer or create jealousy.
3. Possessions enhance or inhibit intimacy
4. Possessions create an atmosphere of interdependence- I am dependent on you.
HOW DO YOU ESTABLISH THE LAW OF POSSESSION
1. Ask your spouse to pray with you.
2. Never make an important decision without the input and agreement of your spouse.
3. Communicate to your spouse that we’re a team. We need each other!
CONCLUSION: Are you completely surrendered to your mate? Is there something you are holding back?
Marriage is designed by God to be a total sharing of life between a man and woman.
Matthew 16:25- “For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.”
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Taming the Tongue - Pastor Kenneth Woolf
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New Life COTR Sunday June 17, 2007
THE POWER OF YOUR WORDS
“Taming the Tongue”
INTRODUCTION: We’ve been in this series for a few weeks on “THE POWER OF YOUR WORDS.”
Our words connect us with God. That’s why it’s important that PRAISE AND PRAYER be in our mouth. It connects us with God.
We’ve learned that in the Kingdom of God there is no such thing as “Freedom of Speech.” We need to control our tongue. Why?
OUR WORDS ARE POWERFUL; THERE IS POWER IN OUR WORDS!
Last week we learned that our words affect the quality of our life, they reveal who we truly are on the inside and our words matter to God. We’re going to be judged concerning our speech.
TRANSITION: Today we’re going to focus on “TAMING THE TONGUE.”
James 3:7, 8- “For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and creature of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by mankind. But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.”
So what’s the point pastor? You’ve been wasting our time. If it’s impossible to tame the tongue why are we doing this series?
It’s humanly impossible to tame the tongue. It’s not within our power to do it. BUT THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT GOD IS NOT HUMAN!
He can tame the tongue, after all He created it and He wrote the owner’s manual. He knows how to get the job done.
Exodus 4:10-12- “Then Moses said to the Lord, O my Lord, I am not eloquent, neither before nor since You have spoken to Your servant; but I am slow of speech and slow of tongue. So the Lord said to him, Who has made man’s mouth? Or who makes the mute, the deaf, the seeing, or the blind? Have not I, the Lord? Now therefore, go and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall say.”
NOTICE WHAT MOSES SAYS IN THIS SCRIPTURE. “I am not eloquent, neither before nor since You have spoken to your servant.”
How many of us can relate to this. I had a problem with my tongue before I came to Christ, and I continued to have a problem with my tongue after I met Him!
BUT LOOK AT GOD’S RESPONSE TO MOSES AND THIS ENCOURAGES ME.
“Who made your mouth son? I’m the one who can make the blind see and even the mute speak. So go! I’ll be with your mouth, I’ll teach you what to say.”
What an amazing promise from God: I’ll be with your mouth! I love the fact that God can be with our mouths every moment of every day and teach us what to say.
We cannot tame our tongues, but we can submit our words to the Lord and allow Him to tame them.
Mark 13:11- “But when they arrest you and deliver you up, do not worry beforehand, or premeditate what you will speak. But whatever is given you in that hour, speak that; for it is not you who speak, but the Holy Spirit.”
Here we see that the Holy Spirit can fill our mouths and give us the right words to speak.
No you can’t tame your tongue but God can when you submit to Him and the agent He uses is the Holy Spirit.
If I’ll submit my tongue to God, the Holy Spirit, every day He helps me tame the untamable.
TRANSITION: How do we work with God to put a bridle on our tongue? IT TAKES TIME! Just Like a wild horse you put a bit and bridle on, it takes time! It’s a process.
We must cooperate with God to make it possible. THREE PRACTICAL THINGS WE CAN DO TO BRIDLE OUR TONGUE!
1. HOLD ON THERE JUST A MINUTE
The first essential piece of such a bridle is to cultivate the ability to PAUSE!
I’m referring to the rare ability to wait and say nothing for a moment. To pause means to simply not say anything until we know precisely what we should say.
Think back to the words of Proverbs 18:21- “Life and death are in the power of the tongue.”
IF words truly wield the power of life and death, and they do, shouldn’t you and I pause before we let our words fly toward the hearts of the people with whom we live, work and worship?
James 1:19- “Therefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.”
If you’ve had a problem with your temper here’s the key to controlling it. Be slow to speak and quick to listen.
Most of us have it backwards. We’re slow to hear and quick to speak.
Proverbs 21:23- “He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.”
That would be an excellent verse to memorize. We should say it every morning. It’s our responsibility to guard our tongue.
Proverbs 10:19- “When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.”
There is wisdom in employing the pause principle!
Proverbs 17:27, 28- “A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered. Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue.”
Pause before you speak.
Mark Twain: “It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.”
TRANSITION: Pause, it is the first key to bridling the tongue.
2. LET’S GIVE THAT SOME THOUGHT
Once we’ve paused before speaking, we’re ready to take the next step in successfully bridling our tongue: PONDER!
There are essentially three types of people in the world: (1) Those who think before they speak; (2) Those who think while they speak; (3) Those who think after they speak.
Well there are those who never think. I’ve met a few like that.
You and I can train ourselves to think before we speak!
Proverbs 29:20- “Do you see a man who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than for him.”
Since our words have power it’s important to think before we speak.
TRANSITION: How do I cooperate with God in taming my tongue? Well, when I’m ready to let words (which are powerful) fly out of my mouth, (1) Hold on there just a minute, (2) Let’s give that some thought.
If we choose to be people who first pause and then ponder. Doing these two things will position us to employ the third key to bridling our tongue.
3. APPEAL TO A HIGHER AUTHORITY
After you pause and ponder, it’s time to PRAY!
The sixth chapter of Isaiah provides with some insights as to why this is important!
Isaiah has been taken up into the throne room of heaven and has seen what no human being as ever fully seen before-the glory of the angelic host around the throne of God.
Isaiah 6:1-4(NIV) - Turn and Read
What an experience! But what I want us to really notice is Isaiah’s reaction to this incredible experience.
Isaiah 6:5- (NIV) - “Woe to me I cried. I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the Lord Almighty.”
What was Isaiah’s initial gut reaction to God’s holiness? He became suddenly and painfully aware of his words!
Isaiah 6:6, 7- “Then one of the seraphs flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with the tongs from the altar. With it he touched my mouth and said, See, this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for.”
God wants to take a coal from the fire of His presence and touch your lips today. He wants to make them fit to speak of His love to a world that He longs to help and heal.
The Bible tells us that God has given us a new heart-that we are to put off the old self and put on the new.
CONCLUSION: How do I bridle my tongue and cooperate with God to tame my tongue?
Hold on just a minute, let’s give that some thought and appeal to a higher authority.
Pause, Ponder and Pray!
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Foundational Laws of Marriage, Part 2: The Law of Persuit - Pastor Kenneth Woolf
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New Life COTR Wednesday June 13, 2007
BUILDING A MARRIAGE THAT ROCKS
(Instead of a Marriage on the Rocks)
“Foundational Laws of Marriage” Part 2
INTRODUCTION: If we’re going to build a marriage that Rocks we must build our marriage on THE ROCK.
WHO MEETS YOUR DEEPEST NEEDS?
What are your deepest needs?
1. Acceptance-knowing you are loved and needed by others.
2. Identity-knowing you are individually significant and special.
3. Security-knowing you are well protected and provided for.
4. Purpose-knowing you have a reason for living. In the case of Christians, this means knowing that God has a special plan for your life.
Whether you realize it or not these needs have been motivating you throughout your life. THESE ARE NEEDS NOT WANTS.
Who meets your deepest needs?
Whom or what do you seek first to most fulfill your need for acceptance, identity, security and purpose?
What should the correct answer be? - I seek God first and more than anyone else or anything to meet my deepest needs.
John 6:35- “Then Jesus declared, I am the bread of life, He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty.”
If you’re going to have a marriage that rocks, you must go to THE ROCK to meet your deepest needs.
Hebrews 13:8- “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”
With this in mind, God is qualified to write the instruction manual on marriage.
Genesis 2:18-25 Turn and Read
FROM THE BEGINNING GOD HAD A BEAUTIFUL PERFECT PLAN FOR MARRIAGE. THAT PLAN HAS NEVER CHANGED!
The sound of crashing marriages al around us does not prove that marriage doesn’t work, but only proves that marriages are not be built on a SOLID FOUNDATION!
If we reject God’s Word and His plan for marriage then they won’t work.
If we dedicate ourselves to learning and following God’s plan for marriage, we will begin to experience the security and fulfillment we have desired.
TRANSITION: So we’re going to look at a small portion of scripture from Genesis 2 and discover God’s Foundational Laws of Marriage!
Jesus used these scriptures when talking to the Pharisees after they confronted Him concerning His views on divorce. Matthew 19:4-6
Also the Apostle Paul quoted these scriptures in his instructions about marriage to the church at Ephesus. Ephesians 5:31
THESE TWO VERSES GIVE US THE FOUNDATIONAL LAWS OF MARRIAGE. THEY ARE LIFE-CHANGING AND MARRIAGE SAVING!
Genesis 2:24-25(NAS)- “For this cause a man shall leave his Father and Mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”
GOD’S FOUNDATIONAL LAWS OF MARRIAGE
Your marriage has a 100% chance of success if you keep these laws!!
I. THE LAW OF PRIORITY
Genesis 2:24(NIV)- “For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother…”
God designed marriage to operate as the second most important priority in life, coming next to your personal relationship with Him!
If we put marriage in any position of priority other than the one God has instituted, the marriage does not work!
Many of us have misplaced priorities and that’s what has caused much of our problems in marriage!
Our priority list should look something like this:
1. God-seeking and serving Him personally
2. Spouse
3. our children-if you have any
4. Church-seeking and serving God together with His Body
5. Extended family and special friends
6. Work and Career
7. Hobbies and other interests
TRANSITION: The Law of Priority if followed will help you have a successful marriage.
II. THE LAW OF PURSUIT
Genesis 2:24(NAS)- ….And shall cleave to his wife…”
“I just don’t love him or her anymore. I guess we must have made a mistake when we got married.”
Have you ever heard those words before? One of the misconceptions about marriage is “that if I marry the right person the emotions will be there naturally and effortlessly. If I had the perfect spouse I would wake-up every day and shout hallelujah.
If my emotions have changed towards my spouse, if I don’t feel the same I must have married the wrong person. (That’s what the devil says)
THE DEVIL WILL TELL YOU THAT YOU SHOULD’VE MARRIED SO AND SO. YOU KNOW, THE GRASS IS GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE HILL!
If the grass looks greener over there it must be time to water your own yard!!!
The reason the grass looks greener over there is because you can’t see the poop from here!!!
Statistics tell us that every time a person remarries their chances for divorce go up 10%.
*****God wants you to understand that through the LAW OF PURSUIT you can stay deeply and romantically in love with your spouse for all your married life.
****For some God is going to restore the love you have now lost for your spouse!
“AND A MAN SHALL CLEAVE TO HIS WIFE…”
If we’re going to understand the LAW OF PURSUIT we must understand the word CLEAVE!
Cleave- “to pursue with great energy and to cling to something zealously.”
So when God told man to “cleave” to his wife he was telling the man to pursue her and energetically cling to her for the rest of his life.
From the very beginning God has known the secret of staying in love-WORK!
MARRIAGE ONLY WORKS WHEN YOU WORK AT IT!!!!
What causes a marriage to slide downward is the lack of work. Taking one another for granted and trying to “coast” through life on the sled of past memories and events creates an inertia that causes a slide backward.
Whether we express it or not, most of us believe that if we marry the right person, we should not have to work at the relationship to stay in love. IT SHOULD JUST HAPPEN!
Many of us have been affected by an incorrect and deceptive view of love and marriage, mainly by Hollywood!
THE WORLD, HOLLYWOOD DOES NOT HAVE THE AUTHORITY TO TELL US WHAT LOVE IS!
Think back to your first date with your spouse. How hard did you work at impressing your date? How much time did you spend preparing yourself physically?
How much energy did you exert trying to please your date trying to impress each other?
This shows that it is not simply chemistry that caused your relationship to be so satisfying at the start! It also involved a lot of hard work!
One normally works very hard at a relationship until one is secure in the love of the other person.
When the relationship seems secure, one gradually reduces the effort and begins to take it for granted.
That point marks the beginning of the end of the deep feelings and strong attraction that characterized the initial stages of the relationship.
For the rest of your life you must work every day at your marriage for it to be rewarding and healthy.
WHEN YOU STOP WORKING AT IT, IT WILL STOP WORKING FOR YOU!
In many ways, marriage is like the muscles in our bodies. When we exercise them regularly, our bodies become strong and attractive.
When we lie around and do not exercise our bodies become weak and unattractive. The more we lie around, the less we feel like exercising, and the weaker our muscles become.
“EXERCISE” IS THE KEY
It doesn’t matter how out of love you are today, if you will begin to work at your relationship, you will soon see the resurrection of feelings and experiences that you thought were gone for good.
Regardless of how you feel don’t allow your emotions to lead you to wrong decisions. Even if you have bad feelings toward your spouse your feelings can change as you obey God’s Command to “CLEAVE.”
If you divorce right now, you could possibly remarry. When you do you will work hard to win that new spouse.
Once you’ve remarried the new and excitement of the new relationship will wear off! And you’ll be in the same boat as before!
Wouldn’t it be simpler to begin again with the one you have now! What not go ahead right now and commit to the hard work to renew your relationship.
You are going to have to commit to it sooner or later if you ever hope to have a happy marriage. Don’t put off until tomorrow what you need to do today!
(The story of the man marrying for the eighth time)
(The story of the divorced woman who lost weight)
****Why is it that we will work so hard to impress total strangers but will not work at all to please the ones we have vowed before God “to love and cherish” for the rest of our lives? ******
Pastor, I know it’s wrong, but I’ve been having an affair. I’ve never experienced such great love in all my life! We get along so well. I have never felt this way about anyone!
SO IT MUST BE GOD’S WILL! I DON’T KNOW IF I CAN EVER BE SATISFIED WITH MY SPOUSE AGAIN!
Affairs are always wrong in God’s sight, and they are destructive!!!
IT doesn’t matter what good feelings you are having or how valid you think it might be, AFFAIRS ARE NEVER GOD!
Get smart! Sin never solves any problem; it simply breeds newer and bigger ones.
No matter the state of your marriage today, if you will work hard at loving your spouse and meeting his or her needs, you will begin to see a big difference in you marriage. THE RESULTS WILL BE INCREDIBLE!
THE LAW OF PURSUIT!!
DECIDE RIGHT NOW THAT YOUR SPOUSE IS THE RIGHT PERSON FOR YOU AND BEGIN TO WORK AT THE MARRIAGE THROUGH PRIORITY AND PURSUIT!!
Maybe you’re at that stage where you’ve lost those feelings and desires to be with your spouse.
God has a three-step plan to restore the first love of your relationship. This is a guaranteed method, because it is found in the Bible.
Revelation 2:4,5(NIV)- “…You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first.
Here we find the three step plan Jesus gave the Ephesian Christians for the renewal of their fervent love for Him!
The same three steps will heal and revive the love of any couple.
1. Remember the height from which you have fallen.
When we were new Christians we were willing to do almost anything to serve Christ. However as time goes on, other things begin to compete for our attention.
If we give in, and most of us do, we find ourselves cooling off toward God.
Most people think this is just a necessary “maturing” that every Christian must experience.
On the contrary Jesus called this the sin of “losing your first love for Him.” HE KNOWS WHY WE LOSE IT TO, WE STOP WORKING AT THE RELATIONSHIP!
Jesus didn’t say to work up some kind of an emotion to restore your first love. He knows it is a decision of the will.
Love the Greek word “agape”- “a commitment to do what is right for someone else regardless of emotions.
God’s standard of love is to act in someone’s best interest regardless of how you feel.
If you always do what you “feel” like doing, your life will be a vicious cycle of pain and confusion.
When you make the decision to do what is right regardless of how you feel, your life will be blessed and secure.
Knowing this Jesus told the Ephesians to “remember” the place from which they had fallen.
He wanted them to recall their actions at the beginning of their commitment to Him when their love was so intense.
HE DID NOT TRY AND GET THEM TO REMEMBER THEIR FEELINGS; HE WANTED THEM TO REMEMBER THEIR ACTIONS.
Remember how you so honored the other person and was sensitive with your speech.
Remember how you did little things to impress the other person.
Remember how both of you thought of each other all day and anticipated and prepared for you times together.
TRANSITION: Remember the actions your first love was built upon then you are ready for step two.
2. Repent
Repent- to turn around or do an about face.
We must change directions in order for our marriage to be healed.
After remembering the fervent actions and right attitudes you displayed at the beginning of the relationship, you are to change any actions and attitudes currently being displayed that are different than those at the beginning.
TRUE REPENTANCE INCLUDES THREE INGREDIENTS.
a. Acknowledging the truth. b. admitting you are wrong c. adjusting your direction
TRANSITION: Remember the actions your first love was built upon, then Repent
3. Do the deeds you did at first.
Note that Jesus requires no emotion from us. He simply said act the way you did when the relationship was young!
Invest your time and energy in the relationship, regardless of how you feel in the process. Joy will come when the work is done!
WE MUST STOP LISTENING TO OUR WOUNDED EMOTIONS AND OBEY THE WORD OF GOD!!!
God’s Word is true. Cleave to your spouse and work at your relationship and the problems will become less and less and your blessings will grow larger and more enjoyable!
It all depends on your willingness to obey God’s command to “cleave to your spouse.”
If you make the decision to pursue your spouse with energy and diligence, you will quickly find it is a labor of love to which you become addicted.
YOU WILL EXPERIENCE THE TRUTH THAT MARRIAGE WILL BECOME GETS STONGER AND MORE SATISFYING WHEN YOU DO IT GOD’S WAY!
Proverbs 14:23- “In all labor there is profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.”
Sunday, June 10, 2007
Curing the Tongue - Pastor Kenneth Woolf
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New Life COTR Sunday June 10, 2007
THE POWER OF YOUR WORDS
“Curing the Tongue”
INTRODUCTION: We’ve been in this series on the power of your words. A core truth in the Bible that we all need to remember is that OUR WORDS HAVE POWER.
We are created in the image of God and God used words to create the universe.
When God wanted to bridge the gap between Himself and mankind the Bible says, “The Word became flesh and dwelt among us.”
Psalm 107:20-(NIV)- “He sent forth His word and healed them; he rescued them from the grave.”
YOUR WORDS ARE POWERFUL, THERE IS POWER IN YOUR WORDS
My words, your words, pave the road that we’re going to drive on tomorrow.
TRANSITION: Just how powerful are your words? These next few verses give us an idea of how important our words are.
Proverbs 13:3- “He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin.”
Proverbs 21:23- “He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.”
Can you see how your words affect your life?
1Peter 3:10- “For, Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech.”
MY WORDS AFFECT THE QUALITY OF MY LIFE!
MY WORDS REVEAL WHO I REALLY AM!
James 1:26- “If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless.”
Matthew 12:33-35- “Make a tree good and its fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit. You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him.
YOUR WORDS ARE POWERFUL; THERE IS POWER IN YOUR WORDS.
TRANSITION: Do my words matter to God?
Matthew 12:36, 37- “But I tell you that men will have to give account on the Day of Judgment for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.”
Numbers 14:26-35- Turn and Read
Your words are paving the road you’re going to drive on tomorrow!!!Your words are powerful and they matter to God!!
TRANSITION: Can you see the value of your words and how they affect your life?
The Bible calls Jesus the Great Physician. I think it’s good for us to allow Jesus to examine our tongue and the words coming from our mouth.
So let’s go in for a check-up this morning. If I’m sick with something that’s going to affect my life in a negative way I want to know about it.
Before you can write a prescription you’ve got to be accurately diagnosed.
SYMPTONS OF A SICK TONGUE
The purpose for diagnosing an illness is so you can be healed! So the first symptom of a sick tongue.
I. TELLING THE UNTRUTH
Lying is probably the most common sickness of the tongue but that doesn’t mean God approves of it.
Proverbs 6:16-19 tells us seven things that God hates. One of those seven is a “lying tongue.”
Why does God hate lying? Because lying is the opposite of His nature. GOD IS TRUTH. He doesn’t just have truth, He is truth.
On the other end of the spectrum the Bible describes Satan as the “Father of Lies.” (John 8:44)
Thus, when we lie we leave the throne of God and go to the throne of Satan. No wonder God hates lying.
TELLING THE UNTRUTH IS A SYMPTON OF A SICK TONGUE!
II. STIRRING UP DIVISION
Proverbs 6:16-19 also tells us that God’s hates it when we sow discord.
Proverbs 6:12-15- “A worthless person, a wicked man, walks with a perverse mouth; he winks with his eyes, he shuffles his feet, he points with his fingers; perversity is in his heart, he devises evil continually, he sows discord. Therefore his calamity shall come suddenly; suddenly he shall be broken without remedy.”
What a serious thing it is to stir up strife, especially among Christian brothers and sisters.
That’s why it grieves me when I see people stirring up strife in the church. I fear for that person’s well-being because the Bible says calamity will come on him suddenly.
I hate to be the one to tell you this, but if you are a person who goes around sowing discord, calamity is on its way to your house.
Titus 3:9-11- “But avoid foolish disputes, genealogies, contentions, and strivings about the law; for they are unprofitable and useless. Reject a divisive man after the first and second admonition, knowing that such a person is warped and sinning, being self-condemned.”
Satan has convinced some people that they are guardians of the truth. So they run from person to person, relating what the other person said.
“I thought you should know” is the common rationalization. In all actuality that person is being used by Satan to sow discord in the church or the family or on the job.
A great Baptist preacher, A.B Simpson once said, “I would rather play with forked lightning, or take in my hand living wires with their fiery current, than speak a reckless word against any servant of Christ, or idly repeat the slanderous darts which thousands of Christians are hurling on others, to the hurt of their own souls and bodies.”
Be a peacemaker rather than a troublemaker. God is a reconciler. God sent His Son into the world for one reason-to reconcile mankind to Himself.
That’s why He hates discord so much. He paid a terrible price to bring people together and He doesn’t look kindly on any activity that drives them apart.
Stirring up division is a symptom of a sick tongue. JESUS CAN HEAL YOUR TONGUE!
III. DISHING THE DIRT
Morgan Blake, a sportswriter for the Atlanta Journal wrote the following words in the newspaper around the time of the First World War
“I am more deadly than the screaming shell from the howitzer. I win without killing; I tear down homes, break hearts, and wreck lives. I travel on the wings of the wind. No innocence is strong enough to intimidate me, no purity pure enough to daunt me. I have no regard for truth, no respect for justice, no mercy for the defenseless. My victims are as numerous as the sands of the sea, and often as innocent. I never forget and seldom forgive. My name is gossip.
A gossip a person who habitually spreads intimate or private rumors or facts.
Some people claim it’s not gossip if it’s the truth. They are deceiving themselves. True or not, it’s gossip if it’s private or intimate in nature.
From God’s viewpoint, if you’re not part of the problem or part of the solution, there is no reason for you to be talking about the matter.
Proverbs 20:19- “A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much.”
Proverbs 16:28(NLT) - “A troublemaker plants seeds of strife; gossip separates the best of friends.”
Gossip is not a new problem in the church.
2Corinthains 12:20-(NLT) “For I am afraid that when I come to visit you I won’t like what I find, and then you won’t like my response. I am afraid that I will find quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfishness, backstabbing, gossip, conceit, and disorderly behavior.”
If you’re talking to other people about it more than you’re talking to God, it’s probably gossip. LET’S BREAK THE HABIT OF GOSSIP!
CONCLUSION: Telling the untruth, stirring up division, dishing the dirt. These are symptoms of a sick tongue.
But the Bible tells us that Jesus is the GREAT PHYSICIAN. Let’s turn to Him today.
1John 1:9- “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”
YOUR WORDS ARE POWERFUL, THERE IS POWER IN YOUR WORDS
Proverbs 15:4- “The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life….”
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Foundational Laws of Marriage, Part 1: The Law of Priority - Pastor Kenneth Woolf
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New Life COTR Wednesday June 6, 2007
BUILDING A MARRIAGE THAT ROCKS
(Instead of a marriage on the Rocks)
“Foundational Laws of Marriage” Part 1
INTRODUCTION: If we’re going to build a MARRIAGE THAT ROCKS then we must build our marriage ON THE ROCK.
1Corinthians 10:4- “…For they drank from the spiritual rock that accompanied them, and that rock was Christ.”
John 7:37,38- “On the last and greatest day of the Feast, Jesus stood and said in a loud voice, If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him.”
John 6:35- “Then Jesus declared, I am the bread of life, He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty.”
These are the most important scriptures you will here in this series on the marriage. They may not seem pertinent for a couple searching for answers in their marriage or for the lonely single person seeking that special someone for a lifetime relationship. But they are invaluable for these people.
Who meets your deepest needs? To really answer this question we must first ask, what are our deepest needs?
1. Acceptance- knowing you are loved and needed by others.
2. Identity- knowing you are individually significant and special.
3. Security- knowing you are well protected and provided for.
4. Purpose- knowing you have a reason for living. In the case of Christians, this means knowing that God has a special plan for your life.
Whether you realize it or not these needs have been motivating you throughout your life. THESE ARE NEEDS NOT WANTS!
Now let’s look at a list of the most common resources people seek for the fulfillment of our deepest needs.
1. Yourself
2. Spouses
3. Friends
4. Children
5. Employers and/or work, jobs, or careers
6. Churches and Pastors
7. Parents
8. God
9. Money/material possessions
10. A combination of two or more of the above.
WHO MEETS YOUR DEEPEST NEEDS?
Whom are what do you seek first to most fulfill your need for acceptance, identity, security and purpose.
What should the correct answer be? I seek God first and more than anyone else or anything to meet my deepest needs.
The fact is most people cannot honestly give that answer, and that is the root of the problem.
Most people never come to Jesus to get there needs met. He is the RIVER OF LIVING WATER. He invites us to come to Him for true fulfillment! He promises us complete satisfaction if we do that.
Whenever a Christian doesn’t go to God to meet their deepest needs they automatically transfer the expectation for fulfillment to the closest person or resource, the one in whom the most hope has been placed.
For many of us that is our spouse. When the expectation for getting our needs met is transferred to anyone or anything besides God, three main problems are created:
1. You always will be disappointed with the results, no matter how well things go.
2. You will lack the inner resources you need to love others the way you should and to confront life successfully.
3. You almost always will be hurt and offended eventually by the one in whom you invested all your trust, because that one cannot possibly meet your deepest needs.
Proverbs 28:26(NAS)- “He who trusts in his own heart is a fool…”
Jeremiah 17:5(NAS)- “Cursed is the man who trusts in mankind and makes flesh his strength.”
Proverbs 11:28(NAS)- “He who trusts in his riches will fall….”
COMPARE THESE WARNINGS TO THE PROMISE OF THOSE WHO TRUST IN GOD!
Jeremiah 17:7,8- “Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord and whose trust is in the Lord. For he will be like a tree planted by the water, that extends its roots by a stream and will not fear when the heat comes; but its leaves will be green, and it will not be anxious in a year of drought nor cease to yield fruit.”
Psalm 125:1(NAS)- “Those who trust in the Lord are as Mount Zion, which cannot be moved, but abides forever.”
Proverbs 29:25(NAS)- “…HE who trusts in the Lord will be exalted.”
The source of fulfillment of our deepest needs is the most important factor in marriage.
Acceptance, Identity, Security, Purpose.
I hope you’ve made the decision to let Jesus be YOUR ROCK and your Source and to allow God to cultivate your heart and build your marriage jupon His Word.
THE SECRET OF A SOLID MARRIAGE
The disastrous conditions of marriage today are not necessary. Every bad marriage and subsequent divorce could be eliminated and replaced by a solid, satisfying relationship, if only each couple would follow God’s plan for marriage!
From the very beginning of creation when God created Adam and Eve He had a perfect design for marriage.
God is qualified to write the instruction manual on marriage. Not Oprah, or Dr. Phil.
Genesis 2:18-25 Turn and read
God’s creation of a woman was perfect. A loving God in a perfect garden with a perfect man created the perfect woman.
God performed His most beautiful work, woman. God created Eve from the place closest to the man’s heart, his rib.
FROM THE BEGINNING GOD HAD A BEAUTIFUL PERFECT PLAN FOR MARRIAGE. THAT PLAN HAS NEVER CHANGED.
Hebrews 13:8- “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”
God’s plan for marriage has never changed. What’s changing around is the world’s system and it’s unstable. Many people try and build their marriage on the instability of this world. Therefore their marriages are unstable.
WE MUST BUILD OUR MARRIAGES ON GOD’S WORD!
Matthew 7:24-27- Turn and Read
Many times there’s a sound of crashing marriages all around us. This sound does not shout that marriage does not work but demonstrates the lack of solid foundations to those marriages.
If we reject God’s Word and His plan, we cannot make marriages work, for marriages only work when we do them God’s way.
If we dedicate ourselves to learning and following God’s plan for marriage, we will begin to experience the security and fulfillment we have desired.
The rain is going to come and the wind is going to blow on everyone. But God’s Word is a solid foundation upon which we can build successfully.
TRANSITION: So, we’re going to look at a small portion of scripture from Genesis 2 and discover God’s Foundational Laws for Marriage!
These scriptures are so monumental to the success of our marriages that Jesus quoted them when the Pharisees were confronting Him concerning His views on marriage in Matthew 19:4-6.
Also the Apostle Paul quoted these scriptures in his instructions about marriage to the church at Ephesus in Ephesians 5:31.
Genesis 2:24-25(NAS)- “For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”
These two scriptures may not seem power-packed but they are. These two verses are life-changing and marriage saving!
These two scriptures will transform your marriage and when we learn the truth from these scriptures and you apply them to your marriage it will give you the marriage God desires for you and me to have.
Psalm 107:20(NAS)- “He sent His word and healed them, and delivered them from their
destruction.”
GOD’S FOUNDATIONAL LAWS OF MARRIAGE
Your marriage has a 100% chance of success in marriage if you keep these laws.
I. THE LAW OF PRIORITY
Genesis 2:24(NIV)- “For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother…”
God said this with the intent that a man would have a special commitment between he and the woman. This commitment between the man and the woman would be more important than any other relationship.
Before a person marries the most important relationship bond is with his or her parents. So God told the man to “leave” his parents so that he could properly “cleave” to his wife.
Now this word is for us today. Adam and Eve didn’t have parents.
IT doesn’t mean we stop honoring our parents because the Bible commands us to “honor our mother and father.”
In Genesis 2:24 the word “leave” in the Hebrew means “to loosen or relinquish.”
So God meant that a man should relinquish the highest position of commitment and devotion previously given to his parents in order to give that position to his wife.
The same instructions apply for the wife.
THE LAW OF PRIORITY- God designed marriage to operate as the second most important priority in life, coming next to your personal relationship with Him.
If we put marriage in any position of priority other than the one God has instituted, the marriage does not work.
Many of us have misplaced priorities and that’s what has caused much of our problems in marriage.
TRANSITION: There are three things all of us need to do in establishing and adhering to correct priorities:
1. List the most important priorities in your life in order of importance.
Most should look like this. :
a. God-seeking and serving Him personally
b. Spouse
c. Our children (if you have any)
d. Church-seeking and serving God together with His Body.
e. Extended family and special friends
f. Work and Career
g. Hobbies and other interests.
The second thing in establishing and adhering to correct priorities.
2. Prove those priorities in real ways.
Three ways to do that:
a. Sacrifice- What will you give-up for me. “for this cause a man will leave his mother and father.”
b. Time- If you really love God you’ll give Him time. Time in the morning, First Day of the week. If it’s just lip service you’ll never really dedicate TIME to God.
Same is true in marriage. Time is a commodity in relationships. You cannot build a relationship beyond the time you give it!!!!
c. energy- I will give up energy to be with you. I love being with you. Don’t have an attitude because you don’t get to do what you want to do. Put energy into the priority!
The third thing in establishing and adhering to correct priorities.
3. Prepare to protect those priorities the rest of your life.
With life’s demands constantly bearing down on you, protecting your priorities becomes more f a real challenge and more necessary every day.
Once you have decided your priorities and committed to prove them out in real ways, the next step is to prepare to protect them from unwanted intrusions.
There are great rewards in getting your priorities inline with God and His Word. “A man shall leave his Father and Mother and cleave to his wife.”
Matthew 6:33(NAS)- “But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added to you.”
CONCLUSION: Do you want your marriage to be successful. Do you want a marriage that rocks instead of a marriage on the rocks.
Prioritize your life with God’s priorities.
The other three of God’s foundational laws for marriage. Pursuit, Possession and Purity.
Homework assignment: Write down separately and honestly what your priorities have been. (Each spouse) Now are those priorities according to the Bible. What should they be?
Sunday, June 3, 2007
Lies Concerning Words - Pastor Kenneth Woolf
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New Life COTR Sunday June 3, 2007
THE POWER OF YOR WORDS
“Lies Concerning Words”
INTRODUCTION: We discovered last week that our words are powerful. Words actually connect us with other people and more importantly connect us with God.
My tongue, your tongue is a loaded weapon that carries the very power of life and death to relationships, our lives and our future.
Proverbs 18:21- “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it, will eat its fruit.”
YOUR WORDS ARE POWERFUL, THERE IS POWER IN YOUR WORDS
Our words connect or disconnect us from God.
Psalm 100- “….I will enter His gates with thanksgiving in my heart and into His courts with praise.”
Ephesians 6:18- “pray in the Spirit always.”
1Thessalonains 5:17- “Pray without ceasing.”
PRAYER AND PRAISE CONNECT US WITH GOD! You can stay connected to God all day long. Simply by the words coming out of your mouth.
God bridged the gap between Himself and mankind through the Word.
John 1: 1,14- “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. The Word became flesh and made His dwelling among us..”
****another great example of how our words connect us with God.******
Romans 10:5-13 Turn and Read
YOUR WORDS ARE POWERFUL, THERE IS POWER IN YOUR WORDS
TRANSITION: In this series you’re going to learn how to use the power of your words to change your life.
BECAUSE YOU REALLY DO MEAN WHAT YOU SAY!
Matthew 12:34- “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.”
Dorothy Nevill- “The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing in the right place, but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
CAN I SPEAK FREELY?
Have you ever heard anyone use this phrase? Usually when someone asks this their wanting to set aside all tact and diplomacy and be brutally honest.
And what their asking is that their words NOT COST ANYTHING. CAN I SPEAK FREELY?
Can I say some words that I really want to say and them not cost me or you something?
Matthew 12:36,37- “But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.”
SO, ARE ANY OF OUR WORDS REALLY FREE?
Or can it be that when we use our words carelessly or recklessly they can be turned around and used against us by the enemy?
TRANSITION: Today I want to point out three lies that Satan hopes every Christian will believe.
1Corinthians 9:24-27- “Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.” Everyone who competes in the games go into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore, I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.”
Folks, we must learn to control our tongue! Exposing the lies of the enemy.
I. YOU HAVE THE RIGHT OF FREE SPEECH
Now I realize where I’m standing. I’m an American too! The First Amendment of the Constitution does guarantee every US citizen the right of free speech. And I’m glad it does!
THOSE FREEDOMS ARE WON AND HAVE BEEN DEFENDED AT ENORMOUS SACRIFICE!
Supreme Court Justice Oliver Wendall Holmes famously declared that our right to free speech doesn’t give us the right to yell “Fire” in the middle of a crowded theater.
YOUR WORDS ARE POWERFUL; THERE IS POWER IN YOUR WORDS.
We as Christian’s carry a duel citizenship. We are not only citizens of the United States of America but we are more importantly citizens of the Kingdom of God!
When it comes to the laws of the Kingdom of God there is no such thing as “FREE” speech! Words matter. They carry spiritual weight.
Satan wants us to believe that words just go out into the atmosphere and just disappear.
How many have heard of a man named Howard Stern? After being continually fined by the FCC for his vulgar sex-obsessed talk show he finally moved to satellite video so he would not have to be accountable for his words.
What he doesn’t know is that one day he’s going to answer to a higher power than the FCC who has been recording every word that is not covered in the blood of Jesus Christ.
YOU SIMPLY CANNOT SAY ANYTHING YOU WANT!
Psalm 141:3- “Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; Keep watch over the door of my lips.”
Anytime you begin a conversation with the words, “I probably shouldn’t tell you this,” it’s a good indication you shouldn’t be having that conversation.
Be like King David in the Bible.
Psalm 39:1- “I will guard my ways, lest I sin with my tongue; I will restrain my mouth with a muzzle.”
PUT A MUZZLE ON IT!
TRANSITION: The first lie of the Satan, 1. You have the right of Free Speech.
II. IF YOUR’E JUST KIDDING IT DOESN’T COUNT
Hey, I was just kidding! What’s the matter, you can’t take a joke? Hey, I was just joking! Come on where’s your sense of humor? Gee, you’re so sensitive!
These are phrases commonly used by those who are trying to get off the hook after saying something mean, insensitive, manipulative or insulting.
Proverbs 26:18,19- “Like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows, and death, is the man who deceives his neighbor, and says, “I was only joking.”
To use words recklessly or dishonestly and then appeal to the I was just kidding defense is like throwing re-hot iron, shooting arrows and flinging death at others.
What if Jay Butts burst into your home with his hunting bow and shot an arrow into your leg and said “hey I was just kidding, you can’t take a joke?” C’mon, where’s your sense of humor!
HURTFUL WORDS PEIRCE PEOPLE AND GO DEEP INTO THEIR SOULS. YOU CAN’T GET OUT OF IT BY SAYING YOU WERE JUST JOKING!
TRANSITION: Lies of the enemy. 1. You have the right of free speech. 2. If you’re just kidding it doesn’t count.
III. ONCE YOUR WORDS ARE FORGOTTEN THERE INFLUENCE IS GONE.
Words echo through eternity and have lasting repercussions.
So much so that we’re going to give an account of our words one day.
James 3:5,6- “Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire…”
TRANSITION: Exposing the lies of the enemy concerning words.
1. You have the right of free speech.
2. If you’re just kidding it doesn’t count.
3. Once your words are forgotten, their influence is gone.
HERE’S THE GOOD NEWS. Bad words last, but good words last longer.
*****Share the story of Tennessee Governor Ben Hooper*****
CONCLUSION: The Power of Words! What that pastor spoke to that little boy who would eventually become a state governor changed his life!
Here’s the truth about words, straight from the scriptures: We don’t have the right to speak “freely at all times; we cannot claim that we’re just kidding when we break hearts and spirits with our words; and we are deceived if we believe that our negative words evaporate into thin air and are quickly forgotten.
BUT POSITIVE WORDS CAN BRING HEALING, AND THEY HAVE A SHELF LIFE WITH NO EXPIRATION DATE.
Proverbs 15:4- “The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue is a tree of life.”
YOUR WORDS ARE POWERFUL, THERE IS POWER IN YOUR WORDS
