The Law of Purity - Pastor Ken Bent

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New Life COTR Wednesday June 27, 2007
BUILDING A MARRIAGE THAT ROCKS
“The Law of Purity”

INTRODUCTION: For the last three Wednesday’s we’ve been discovering the spiritual laws of God that govern the institution of marriage. If these laws are followed we can know that we can have a 100% chance in marriage if we follow God’s laws.
Keynote scriptures: Genesis 2:24,25(NAS)- “For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother and cleave to his wife and they shall be one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and they were not ashamed.”
From these scriptures we find the four foundational laws of marriage that God has called both man and woman to follow and in turn the results will be a happy, productive, peaceful marriage.
A MARRIAGE BY GOD’S DESIGN!
Review: What are the three laws we’ve already discovered?
1. The law of Priority- “A man shall leave his father and mother.
2. The law of Pursuit- “and cleave to his wife.”
3. The Law of Possession- “the two shall become one flesh.”
TRANSITION: Tonight we’re going to focus on Genesis 2:25- “And the man and his wife were both naked and they were not ashamed.”
After God created Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, He did not clothe them. He did not intend to prepare artificial coverings for them. God’s perfect will was for them to remain naked.
In the beginning of time, God intended marriage to be a place of total “NAKEDNESS.”
Physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. This is the condition Adam and Eve enjoyed in the garden.
They were completely exposed before God and one another. In this condition they shared themselves totally in an atmosphere of intimacy and openness.
This is God’s picture of a perfect marriage relationship. It’s called the “LAW OF PURITY!”
Law of Purity- God designed marriage to operate in an atmosphere of purity. In that atmosphere we can expose ourselves to one another!
Marriage is designed in such a way that a man and woman instinctively share ourselves with one another.
However for this to take place there must be a prepared and protected atmosphere providing an environment for us both to “get naked.”
God designed the “nakedness” of marriage to include every area of our lives, body, soul and spirit.
When we are able to “undress” ourselves in every area before our spouses without shame or fear, we are in a healthy place for strong intimate relationships to develop.
If we cannot expose ourselves completely to our spouse we are hiding something. The hidden thing needs to be exposed.

SIN IS THE GREATEST OBSTACLE TO OPENNESS AND THE LAW OF PURITY.
After Adam and Eve sinned they searched for leaves to cover their genitals. Before they sinned their genitals were shamelessly uncovered.
This signifies three things:
1. Their differences could be openly expressed. (The genitals were the most obvious physical difference.)
2. They could have unhindered intimacy. (There was no clothing to remove for sex.)
3. Their most sensitive areas could be exposed without fear. (Genitals are the most sensitive area of the body.)
Conversely, the fig leaves with which Adam and Eve clothed themselves after sinned entered their relationship with God represent three things.
1. Our differences cannot be safely expressed where sin is present.
2. Sin damages and often destroys the atmosphere necessary to breed intimacy.
3. The sensitive areas of our lives and delicate issues in our relationships cannot be safely exposed when sin is present.
SIN IS THE GREATEST OBSTACLE TO OPENNESS
You can only expose yourself in an atmosphere of purity!
TRANSITION: There are three things to understand when applying the LAW OF PURITY to your marriage.

1. Sin is always deadly.
Romans 6:23- “For the wages of sin is death….”
2. Purity must be upheld by both partners in order for the relationship to provide a climate for total exposure.
Both partners in a marriage must be careful about what is allowed in their lives.
A spouse has a right to be concerned about every area of a partner’s life. Anything that person does will directly affect the other.
3. Purity is for every area of marriage.
When a robber wants to get into your home, he doesn’t need you to leave every door and window open. He only needs one way inside.
If he can gain one entry point, he can burglarize your entire house. THE SAME IS TRUE OF SIN!
The devil doesn’t need a person to sin in many areas in order to destroy that life or marriage. He only needs one entry point to give him a “stronghold” from which to bring destruction.
1Peter 5:8(NIV)- “Be self-controlled and alert. You enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”

SEVEN STEPS TO PURITY IN MARRIAGE
1. Take responsibility for your own behavior.
Don’t focus primarily on your spouse; focus on yourself. You cannot change his or her behavior. But with the help of God you can change yours.
Luke 6:41 (NIV)- “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?
Take responsibility for your own words and actions and build an atmosphere of purity and trust from your side first.
2. Do not return sin for sin.
God’s Word (Luke 6:27-36) tells us to return evil with good and even to love our enemies.
Revenge and retaliation will never solve a problem in a marriage. Those attitudes and behaviors will only perpetuate a problem and even make it worse.
Wives and husbands both must commit to using purity, not sin, in dealing with their problems.
3. Admit your faults.
The heartfelt and sincere expression, “I’m sorry; I was wrong; will you forgive me?” can heal a marriage quicker than almost anything else.
1John 1:9(NIV)- “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”
On the other hand, pride and self-deception lead to an atmosphere where exposure to one another is to risky.
James 4:6, 5:16(NIV)- “….God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.”
4. Forgive
Matthew 6:14-15(NIV)- “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
Forgiving other people is a serious issue God! Unforgiveness poisons our hearts.
Hebrews 12:15(NIV)- “See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.”
Unforgiveness is like a dead rat in the attic. IT MAKES THE WHOLE HOUSE STINK!!!
The opposite is true of forgiveness. We are blessed and refreshed when we forgive others and get rid of unhealthy thoughts and feelings.
Here are five steps to forgiveness:
*Release the guilty person from personal judgment.
*Love the person who has offended you.
*Bless and pray for that person.
*Do not bring up the hurt in the future.
*Repeat this process as many times as necessary.
5. Speak the truth in love.
In the marriage there should an atmosphere of communication in which each spouse can communicate in love their thoughts, emotions and feelings.
This is not retrieving old hurts. It is taking care of problems as they arise in order for the couple to live in purity.
Some scriptures from Ephesians should be remembered when spouses confront one another.
Ephesians 4:15, 25-27(NIV)- “Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.”
6. Pray for each other.
There may be some things in you spouse’s life that you simply cannot change. Only God can.
Pray for your spouse.
James 5:16(NIV)- “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.”
7. Seek righteous fellowship.
1Corinthians 15:33(NIV) “Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character.”
It is most difficult to keep a marriage pure when our main fellowship and association are with people who are impure.
YOU DON’T NEED FRIENDS WHO WILL SEDUCE YOU INTO SIN!
Before we can experience all of the beauty and holiness of purity, we must be in an atmosphere of purity.

CONCLUSION: The Law of Purity! Don’t allow yourself to be robbed of God’s best for your marriage by Satan’s lies. Be diligent to remain pure, and God will bless you beyond your wildest dreams!
Matthew 5:8(NIV)- “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.”